Dear New Fling,

     I am gonna give this a shot. I don't know what to do about you really. You are a sweet guy. You truly are. You treat me good, you do your best to make sure I am the happiest. You pamper me, and you spoil me. You brag about me and tell me all the things I want to hear. You call me beautiful, and you let me know that you are fond of me. However, It isn't the same. I mean, maybe it is just the recent break up. I mean on paper, you are exactly what I want. However, it isn't the same.
     I am so hung up. I'm gonna have to get over it... I mean there isn't much else I can do. I just. There is a comfort level with you. I am comfortable. I don't worry. I know you won't hurt me. You won't ever let me fall. I know that. You are a sweetheart. A total sweetheart. We have both been hurt. I know that. However, I feel safe with you. But like I said.. It just isn't the same. I mean... This is probably what is healthy for me. You would be healthy for me... You're a rock, a solid fixture. You are... Consistent. However, It just isn't the same.
     What am I supposed to do. You are healthy. You are safe. But he... oh he.. He is passion. He is fire and pure indulgence. You are the salad I should eat, but he is that dessert that I crave. That is awful to say. I know it is. But meeting you I instantly felt relieved. I felt safe. Meeting him, the butterflies about made me sick. What is better? I mean, granted I can't take him back. That is a non-option right now, but it is still food for thought. I mean I guess it is why I haven't put all the effort I should in meeting you. I guess that is why I struggle with telling you that I want to hang out and be around you. I do. I mean I love your company but I miss him. That is wrong. I know it is. And I know you say you aren't too worried about it but I also know  I don't want to hurt you by still being in love with him. I don't know why I am.. but I am... Call me stupid, because that is what I call myself. I won't go back. I won't do that to myself, but how I crave that fire... I mean, It is entirely true that if you play with fire, you get burned, and boy did I get burned, but is it bad that I crave that burn again. I guess that makes me some kind of masochist. But I think I will get over it.
    I am gonna give this a shot. It is the least I can do if you are going to put yourself out there. If you are going to try, the least I can do is be nice and try too... I guess we will see how it goes. Here is to safe consistency...
         -xoxo, Jessi