Dear Jason,

     I normally don't write letters to specific people... Im usually agianst that... however, today, I need to write one to you. I don't know if you still read my blog, or if you  ever look back at it now and then... I can't say the things I want to you. I can't really tell you how I actually feel. I just I want to be in your life. I really do, but my heart (as cliche as it sounds) can't handle being with you... You have already moved on, which I am proud of you for doing... but I can't help but hate her a little. I mean, I know you will make her happy, and I hope that our relationship taught you something. However I can't help but be upset.... I know I have no right. I know that. I have absolutely no right to be upset. I know I dont. but I am. Which sucks.
    I don't think our relationship was healthy for me. I always was so insecure. Which isn't good at all. However, I know that I miss you. Which I also have no fucking right to say. It just sucks that I had to let you go for you to learn a lesson. I mean I  love you. You are the first boy, I can honeslty say that I was in love with... It didn't matter that you weren't the best boyfriend because there was just something about you. Still is. I haven't had the heart to ask what all you want back, because Im not sure that I can handle seeing you... I will get strong enough and bring all your stuff back. I haven't forgotten it... I promise.  I am glad you are moving on... and I am glad you can make someone happy... But please forgive me if I am the least bit excited for her. Because I was her. I had that feeling she has. It was me that was all starry-eyed over you and would do anything to gain your attention. That was me. That was my spot in your life. And now it is hers. And that is fine. That is healthy, but I am so jealous of the fact she get's the attention I always wanted.
    You couldn't have lied to me? You couldn't have made it sound like you are just working on you? You couldn't have spared me that one last little ego hit. Gosh, is she prettier than me? Does she take care of you like I did? Is she gonna make the impact I always wanted to make? I don't understand. I don't understand why you never proved it all to me... Anyway, enough crying... now time to move on... Goodbye Jason.
     -xoxo, Jessi.